Saturday, April 12, 2014

Resolve your frustration

Today a friend of mine shared that she was feeling some frustration and upset around interactions with a fellow coworker that seem to be ongoing in the work environment. I suggested that she try practicing tonglen. Tonglen is the simple act of breathing in the pain and/or suffering of another person, situation, or even your own pain and/or suffering that is representative of the suffering of the collective.

It is a gift to remember that we are never alone in what we are feeling. In times of our darkest struggle, is it possible that we could open to the notion that there have been billions of other beings that have felt the same way at one time? And, that in moments of your deepest pain, fear, sadness, love, joy, and ecstasy, that there are many others not necessarily in the same space, or even on the same continent, that are feeling that same way.

I have found this to be a beautiful practice that has been really useful in my day-to-day life, especially when I am feeling frustrated by something or I am having trouble fully facing the extent of that which I am feeling and experiencing within myself and in the larger field of my external life.

Somebody once wisely expressed that one of the most challenging things one can do is to practice tonglen with someone you feel triggered by or someone that you even perceive as an enemy. I often ask myself, what are they showing me that I don't wish to see within me?

It is often easy to forget that when we judge others we are only judging ourselves. What better way to transmute the energy of the situation and bring us into direct contact with the unveiled truth of our experience by breathing in someone's pain or the pain of a situation, even on a global level and breathing out love. It is a humbling heart cracking open practice and can often be extremely challenging, but also very rewarding.

The more that we allow ourselves to feel, the more we can actually be in connection with our selves and one another.

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